Snow and Running

I woke up to snow this morning!! Its such an anomaly around here, it was a huge surprise! The higher areas of Vancouver got plenty, enough to even have to shovel out their cars. We only had a light dusting, maybe a couple centimeters in some places. This is just one more reason I love Vancouver- we can have pretty snow that catches our imagination and childlike wonder, but it's gone by lunchtime. After growing up on the East Coast, where winter comes with snow, freezing rain, windchill factor, snowbanks, blizzard like conditions, living here is a dream. I've never been a big fan of winter- I'm not a skier, nor do I play hockey. I always found myself counting the days till spring- every year! I've been able to miss a few Canadian winters by traveling and living in the Southern Hemisphere for a couple years, but our first winter here has been easy. I haven't had to put my "winter coat" on at all and this is the second time we've seen any snow at all! No plugging the car in at night so it will start in the morning. No drastic changes in temperature, reeking havoc with our bodies and cars and roads. Here you can choose to drive up to the mountains and spend some time in the snow, then drive back down to the green lushness of the city. I can choose- How amazing is that!!?!! Sure, it rains (7 weeks in a row through December + January), its grey, it does get cold, but it seems to be much kinder to my moods and my psyche and my body this way. We plan on staying here for awhile, but if we ever decide to move again, it'll be hard to find somewhere that agrees with us so much.

Inspired by Megg and Bohemian Girl, who have been talking about running this week, I've decided that its time to get motivated again. I am turning 30 in April and wanted to do something big for just myself, a present to me, so I decided back in January to run a 10km that just so happens to be starting around the corner from my house, 3 days before my birthday. I think it was a sign. I got my other half, R, to help by running with me, and we even got up to 3-4 times a week, running at least 30 minutes. Then, life got in the way, friends came to visit, and I totally lost all motivation to go at all. I find running so hard. There's a voice in my head that sounds like someone is running next to me and yelling at me to stop, to give up, that I suck, that I won't be able to finish, on and on and on. Some days I can ignore it enough to get through, others it makes me feel like lying down and crying. Does anyone else get this? I've been an athlete all my life, but with ankle injuries and growing up, staying fit has become such a chore. The only physical activity I love is yoga- I could do that 7 days a week forever! Probably has something to do with being part of a class, not having to push my body to the point of pain unless I want to, and being able to relax while getting fit. Running brings me satisfaction sometimes, with that physical release and being able to go a bit farther, but on the whole, I don't know what I've gotten myself into! I told everyone I was going to do this run, so I can't back out now. I still want to live up to my goal for myself, even though I may be faltering. I've got six weeks left, so I want to be as ready as I possibly can...anyone have any ideas how to make sure I get out there and do it? How to keep that negative voice quiet? How to learn to actually enjoy running??

Almost forgot, Grateful Friday! I am grateful for:

• the BC government helping R get to stay for awhile
• the real possibility that he could be working soon
• his ability to handle 6 months of uncertainty and days alone so well
• the future we are going to be able to share together, in the same place
• the snow and then the sun coming out
• chai lattes (again!)
• my rediscovery of oranges - so yummy!
• the comments I've gotten on here this week
• all the words I've been able to read from my other bloggers
• things working out (knock on wood!)